July 25

Once a Thorn, Always a Thorn.

Today started off weirdly.

I was woken between seven and eight by incredible crashing noise.  I leapt up, sure that a tree had fallen . . . on the garage, on the house, taken out the chicken house, SOMETHING.  I ran all around like the proverbial chicken with head cut off trying to find the source of such a brief-yet-tremendous commotion . . .and could find nothing.

There were a whole lot of turkey feathers — especially little downy turkey baby feathers — out at the fence, though.  Now, four turkeys were walking down the driveway calmly on the other side of the house while I was running about . . . and I really hope that no animal attacked them.  But even good ole’ turkey family fighting . . . I mean, that would/should in no way have made me think TREE CRASHING THROUGH A BUILDING.  Right?  Wouldn’t you agree?

Still haven’t found out the cause.  Honestly, was wishful dream thinking that The Thorns had been knocked off the mountain by the mighty hand of God . . . but alas, no, they are still there.

—-

Oh, speaking of The Thorns (get ready, your favorite part!) . . . the character who was known as “Serial Killer” was recently replaced in the rental lineup by someone who . . . is going to require a hefty dose of behavior modification.  Oh indeed.

We’ve noticed, Neighbor’s noticed, that this particular addition doesn’t seem to appreciate the slow speed with which one should respectfully treat their gravel driveway.  Nay, he seems to have confused our small, country one lane gravel driveway with Charlotte Highway.  So there is that.

Then, the other day on our way in, we stopped to get the trash can since it was Trash Day . . . and Knobby hauls the bin while I drive.  Well, I look up from having gotten in and punching my seat button . . . and find that here this new Thorn is in front of me (having been flying down the driveway, naturally).  Honestly (and Knobby agreed, from his standpoint watching this go down while standing on the side of the road holding our trash bin), the new addition was a bit RUDE to me . . . after I had had to back up for him IN MY OWN DRIVEWAY, mind you . . .

Yes.  Behavior Modification will come, disrespectful boychild Thorn.  It will come.  Knobby hates, HATES that he will punch his gate code and then spin his back Jeep tires out in his haste to fly up the driveway.  Oh does Knobby hate that.  The increasing hole at our gate that has newly developed since his arrival.

What do I hate?  Oh, you know how I hate the disrespect we have frequently (far too frequently) witnessed in the grassy median of our two driveways here.  BUT.  Last night, this yahoo (and it is, certifiably, undeniably him when you see this in the high def original footage rather than the compressed content that goes up on our site video) exhibited THE most egregious disrespect for personal driveway property we’ve yet to see.

Just look at this imbecile:

Oh readers. Readers.

Cover your eyes and ears, because I’m going to be unladylike here and tell you that this has surpassed “Oh HELL no” territory.

We have even left the MORE severe “Oh HAYL no” redneck good-ole-boy revenge territory with this footage.

We have entered, my readers, personal undying vendetta territory.  I may have uttered an unladylike “hell” up there, but you don’t even want to IMAGINE the new term I just called him while muttering about what type of person would require this variety of behavior modification.

Oh no.  No, we have to go wash our mouth out with the antibacterial soap.

I feel better, though, when I picture myself . . . like this . . . but with spike strips . . .

ironman spike strips

(IronMan2)

. . . descending upon him with spike strips in my hands the next time he flies down my driveway so rudely.

Wouldn’t that be deliciously rewarding behavior modification.

Just you wait, new addition.

Just.

You.

Wait.

Posted by pixy . Filed under Thorns

July 24

Sleepzombie

I feel silly saying this. But. Yesterday we woke up early and hauled ourselves out to the hospital for Minion’s appointment with the pediatric urologist, and today we woke up early and hauled ourselves out to the hospital for a doctor’s appointment for ME. I guess I should let you know that “early” meant that […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under Minion

July 23

Doctors Appointment and Random Houses

I have this annoying sinus headache.  It’s more of an ache on my head than a headache. Take your tube of lipgloss, push it into the arch between your eyebrow and your nose, and that’s how it feels. Sinus pressure. Yay. —- Went to the pediatric urologist today . . . an appointment I’d been […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under Housewife, MimiHouse, Minion

July 22

Movie Night Minion

I’m a bit under the weather. I attempted uploading and arranging tons of pictures I’ve saved to my desktop but never put onto the FieryPyroPixy site . . . I got halfway through before I made a new tag for our recent stay at the Carolina Inn, and the system went bonkers. Knobby’s got many […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under Minion

July 18

Speculation

The Nordstrom Anniversary Sale is here . . . I’m suddenly wishing I hadn’t done that bit of revenge-shopping this past week when Knobby stayed up very very late playing video games. That’s what happens, you know, when the husband decides to sit at his computer yelling into a headset microphone at his friends in […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under MimiHouse, Minion, The Art of Commerce

July 16

Almost Done

Poor Minion had to go for shots on Monday, and his little chunky thighs are still marked and bruised.  Sad face. He’s now 16 pounds, seven ounces, and is seven inches longer than he was when born.   She wants us to start real foods in a week or two.  We stopped on the way […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under MimiHouse, Minion

July 13

Just Six Little Buttons

So . . . If you look to the left in this picture from the last entry, you’ll see the kitchen.   Then this weekend happened. “Just six little buttons in the wall”, he said. I was tired of all the remotes at the door.  You always had to stick your arm out of the kitchen […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under MimiHouse, Minion

July 12

Evar.

I’m tired. You’ve been asking for Minion pics. I’ll keep things short. Tuesday, had to go for an outpatient procedure at the hospital.  Hospital feels like an eternity away, Knobby had important meeting, I had Mom come over and watch Minion.  Drove myself (I know.  Whoa.), everything went speedily (especially for hospital time), was driving […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under AvaRitaChu, MimiHouse, Minion

July 8

Tantrum

This is how I act when Knobby drags me out of a good jewelry store.  

Posted by pixy . Filed under Minion

July 3

Leering and Photobombing

Speedy cars everywhere, and only a Hemi for me. Yesterday there was another new S8 in the parking lot of the new Fresh Market on Hendersonville Road. Sadly, old people were driving it.  Driving it very slowly. Today we parked facing an S7 in the Lowes parking lot. Sadly, they chose the boring silver (and […]

Posted by pixy . Filed under DailyDriver, Minion